I am going to Fall Formal tonight.
I don't want to.
I am going because I have a dress, because I paid for the ticket, because I told everyone I was going, even though I don't want to and I know I won't enjoy myself.
To be honest, I would much rather go to the LARP I usually attend every other Friday, where for five or six hours I can forget who I am and become someone else, all for the cost of only two dollars - where I can get a mysterious note or hear someone say something that makes my knees tremble and my stomach twist but it's not my knees or my stomach, even though my mind pretends it is. At the dance, all I can do is dance for a little while, get tired, sit down, drink punch, eat chocolate, get sick, want to go home, and be stuck until my ride decides she wants to go home.
I hate loud noises, I hate crowds, I hate modern music, and I hate the fact that the only reason I'm going to this godforsaken dance is because everyone expects me to.
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